Imbolc began at sunset tonight and runs through sunset tomorrow. I really don’t understand my preoccupation with the Celtic holiday. New Age hasn’t really been my thing. But there is no denying how important today has become to me. Tonight at sunset I took my St. Brigid’s Cross, my triskele, and my candle to celebrate Imbolc and a fresh start. The triskele represents many tripartite Celtic beliefs. For me today, that is life-death-rebirth. This is the first time since I lost Janelle that I have not only acknowledge her departure, but also honored what we had, and that we will always have. Which seems so odd coming out of the ends of my fingers. So Janelle.

Though I am not a believer, I would like to think Janelle was watching this evening. Watching as I tried to keep the candle lit. Watching as I tried to avoid the incoming tide. Watching as I finally admitted that the relaxed and meditative ceremony I had imagined wasn’t going to happen. And watching as I turned to go and realized the tide had cut me off from the stairs up the seawall. She’d have laughed her ass off.

To Nelle – you recreated my life once in person; you continue to guide my soul even in your absence. Love, ME2